One of the things we’ve been lead to believe is that women are the devalued figures of a system; even today, the world keeps perceiving that concept as real and this makes us act with resistance to stay away from the truth and it’s for fear, that the world prefers to leave women as an image that’s under faith.

It’s important to mention that faith is not precisely related with a religious term; faith comes from the power you give to something in which you’re deciding to believe in; in the same way, women have been conceptualized under lacking concepts of that power; that’s why the fight to be noticed as existing equal creatures; has become a confrontation for that system that keeps believing that women are not able to do anything by themselves.

Part of the women’s nature is the perpetuation of the species to become into something that’s called mother; but, what’s to be a mother? In my opinion, being a mother is a conscious icon because within her, there’s values, beliefs, virtues, talents and skills; and part of its great work is recognizing herself as the container of all those notions, so with that same power she can transfer it to whoever comes on her behalf.

Time ago I talked you about the project purpose; I shared with you this refers to the design our parents gave us when they chose to create us; this becomes the decree that we follow with loyalty and love towards them, because remember when a woman is pregnant, her emotions, thoughts, feelings, beliefs and pains are transmited to that baby that’s within her because everything the mom is; the baby is in unity with her.

When that baby’s born, s/he wants to be next to her mother because until that moment that’s the only thing s/he knows; her emotions, thoughts, feelings are the things this baby perceives as real; if the mother was upset during the pregnancy, that baby won’t stop crying for that irrational annoyance s/he feels; if the mother was sensitive because she felt fat and her self-esteem decreased, that baby is going to feel rejected by her; if the mother was away from the father, that baby will perceive the father as a stranger and hardly they’ll have a closer relationship; if the mother was worried during the pregnancy, that baby will manifest cramps as part of the stress; if the mother was constantly fighting with the father while she was pregnant, surely that baby will manifest reflux as a demonstration of his/her disgust.

I want to tell you that the role our mother has is fundamental for our adult life and despite that’s a bond that unites, it’s also a bond that destroys because our mother had her dysfunctions and inherited them on us and possibly until today you haven’t noticed how those beliefs have an impact on you.

I’ll tell you a story; there were two brothers, one of them older than the other; both were playing very rude; the youngest one started to cry and ran after her mother to look for comfort and told her that his older brother hit him and said terrible things to him.

What the mother of two did, was to run looking for  “justice” and chose to tell her oldest son: “you’ll see how miserable your life is going to be”; that son believed her and despite that he’s a very intelligent man, hardly believes on himself as a succesful human being, because he has assured his life be the way her mother ordered; that man is my father.

What I want to tell you with this is that the words of a mother will always have a positive or a negative weight because we’ll carry on us those words that are printed in our unconsciousness; this means that everything that’s said by her will be the truths that we’ll use as the main tools to perceive the world and build our fate.

Has it happened to you that when someone asks you for a favor and you don’t want to do it, you end up saying yes because you don’t know how to say no?  That’s part of the education our mother taught us, always say “yes” because saying “no” was sign of being rude; therefore, we’re not educated to say no, because doing it generates guilt on us because we believe that if we say no, we’re going to hurt others and if that happens, the others will reject us; this makes that we stop listening to ourselves about what we really want; knowing how to say no is a gift that only a few practice because it speaks about the congruence and when we vibrate in coherence, we understand that we’re not responsible of the emotional states of others when we say: “no, I can’t”, “no, I don’t want”, “no, I don’t agree”; we can only be in charge of our emotions but we’re not responsible of the others reactions.  

I want to tell you that there aren’t bad or good mothers, that’s part of our judgements that take away the humanity in people; you have a complete mother that made mistakes and followed a formula that for generations worked and thanks to it, she generated certain destructives bonds with the world; until today, I haven’t met a mother who teaches her children how to choose with freedom knowing that freedom possibly doesn’t include her anymore.

There are mothers that love, some that hate and there are others who act from both places; that’s part of the influence that woman had to become a mother, none of them is good or bad she’s just accomplishing a role which she didn’t know how to play with consciousness.

Remember that the bond you have with your mother is unbreakable but it’s in you to decide which words to follow or leave behind, have in mind that our need of approval starts with her and if within her teachings wasn’t recognizing you: you’ll attract relationships that’ll be the mirrors of your mother and that’ll impede you to take charge of who you are because you’ll do everything that’s on your hands to put others wishes before you, with the purpose to be recognized; have in mind that a lot of things that your mother told you were mistaken, because she talked you from her insecurity and taught you with the words she heard and learned and couldn’t assimilate; but if you decide to follow those decrees that were based on : “you can’t”, “there’s no money”, “you’re not”, “you’re ugly”, “you have to be”, “you have to fight”, “life’s very hard” etc., then you will face the inflexibility of your beliefs, those you keep putting faith on, only to remain faithful to your mother.

Be yourself;

Shary ChavLó ∞