When we were in our mom’s belly we were a project of our parents with a genetic load of our ancestors; that design is called “project purpose”.

When the baby is in the mother’s belly, s/he feels that s/he belongs to an environment because s/he is united with someone; if the mother rejects the baby since the moment she finds out about the pregnancy, that program of rejectment will remain in the unconscious of that baby who one day, will become an adult.

I’ve told you that all of us have a belonging sense, why? Because the human being is scared of dissociation because deep inside, feels separated from the universe that created him/her, that’s why humans need to be close to social circles where they’ll project their biggest fear that is, being alone.

Normally our need of belonging gets more affected in our couple’s relationships because there’s where we generate dependency contracts with the other. Remember that inside our infinite beliefs is one that says love comes from the outside, that’s why we co-create relationships from places that don’t vibrate in love because those relationships are focused in our need of belonging and lack of love, the one we didn’t receieve from of our mother nor from our father, and if we don’t make consciousness of these dysfunctions, then we’re destinated to look for a nonexistent love.

Don’t let someone who doesn’t know your value,
tell you how much you worth.

Paulo Coelho.

We have all had dependent relationships because we need to generate consciousness in every situation we experience, it doesn’t matter how long it takes us; we’ll keep attracting those type of relationships because the learning will be inside of every experience until we wake up and choose future relationships without any contract attached.

Imagine all those unwanted children, and I’m not talking about a conscious rejectment  of the mother; but about those children whom their mother, when she found out of the pregnancy, felt terrorized or impacted; despite she felt a subsequent illusion, the program of “the not wanted children” remained printed in the fetus as a response of the emotional reaction of the mother.

How does this program impacts when we look for a couple? Our “not wanted” programs will make us feel insecure and we’ll look for couples who will challenge us on a self-esteem level because for our collective unconscious the search for love is fundamental for the human existence; remember that in our biological nature is the perpetuation of the species and for that to be achieved we need a couple with whom we can accomplish that function.

Has it happened to you that when you meet someone you feel an attraction you haven’t felt before? That’s what I call “crushing programs” this means the reason why you feel intensely attracted to this other, is because s/he perfectly resounds with what you are carrying in your unconscious; because your attraction is based on a resonance, that’s why you use physical attraction as the reason to justify the charm, when in reality, it’s the compatibility of what you think you need and what the other is offering you.

Let’s say you’re a woman who normally looks for couples to dominate because when you were little your father worked a lot or he wasn’t there because he had a lover; that left in you an abandonment program that you reject; and the guy you feel attracted to, will fulfill the role of your father with a possible infidelity he learned from his father due to a demanding wife; that’s the need your program requires to exist and that doesn’t allow you to be free.

Possibly all your couples are older than you because unconsciously you look for a father you didn’t have for many reasons; and your program will be fulfilled when you find a man who looks for a daughter of whom he can take care of because since he was a child he believed that he was the savior of the family because he was the oldest son; that’s the need your program requires to exist and that doesn’t allow you to be free.

Maybe you don’t have a couple because you’re waiting for the ideal man you can call “your prince charming” this is because your program needs a man that only lives inside a mental stereotype because possibly your mother wasn’t with the love of her life; that’s why you, unconsciously won’t have her permission to have your own; but in your need of belonging, will arrive a man that you’ll see as the ideal one and you’ll clasify  him as the love of your life; you’ll look at him like that because that person is created from an illusion that with the time will be teared apart and when that happens, you’ll make yourself believe that you couldn’t find the man of your dreams because you’re with someone wishing to be with someone else, that’s the need your program requires to exist and that doesn’t allow you to be free.

The place where I live has two security gates, one of them is taken care of by a man and the other by an 18 year old kid; this kid has the need to work because his mother abandoned him and his 13 year old sister to be with her couple; because the need of not being alone is stronger than the love for her children, what kind of couples do you think these kids will look for in the future?

I want you to know that we didn’t came here to transcend our life next to a couple, we came for many reasons that are not always related to be with someone; all those beliefs of necesity, belonging, abandonment, loneliness are beliefs created for a collective that says happiness is found in the other, that’s why the first requirement we search in someone is: “that s/he  can make me happy” and that’s out of reality.

I think it’s amazing that you want to have a relationship where you join to a partner, but if your energy to find him/her is based on a contract you sign for “need to be loved by someone” then, that’s what you’ll find: a man or woman that won’t be able to satisfy  your lackings until you learn how to fulfill them by yourself; and if you don’t make consciousness of this, you’ll take yourself to live a relationship that will challenge, hurt and destroy you because your need to be with someone is going to be bigger than the need of loving yourself.   

Wake up,
Shary ChavLó ∞