Sometimes we feel so lonely in this universe we think we must retain everything, and in that way feel accompanied during the rest of our life; we believe we are the owners of people, material things, situations etc. But in reality, nothing belongs to us.

Betrayal wound can arise when one of the parents of the child’s opposite sex doesn’t accomplish the promises he/she made to the child or when the trust has been betrayed; what happens is that the child eventually turns into a controller, thus an untrusty being.

I recently told you that my other wound was the betrayal wound, I am a woman who likes to control time and situations.

For me, punctuality is something I have to work on and costs me to unhook myself from the situation because I always need to be on time, since for me that’s representative of my control over everything, and if someone doesn’t arrive on time I get bothered and irritated and avoid thinking of all the circumstances that could delay people, and start feeling betrayed by others, because I believe that people is not interested in giving their best and judge them irresponsable, also their action make me feel they don’t recognize me and don’t appreciate the time that I’m giving for them, this means, that my rejection wound is operating next to my need of control.

It happens that controllers don’t like others to give their opinion, that’s when the wound detonates because they feel others are not right, because nobody knows more than them.

Controllers always have high expectations because they like to prevent everything in order to control it and when those expectations don’t work as they had planned, they become aggressive, feeling that’s the only way to feel self-confident; in the end, the controller wants to feel responsible of others because perceives them as weak and therefore can gain the recognition of others for how well the controller does things.

Everything requires our willingness to forgive
what we do to ourselves or the others.

Lise Bourbeau.

In every wound I’ve spoken, I’ve said the only thing we need is to recognize and accept our wounds, because if they are there is to teach us how to continue because the fact that they are there, only represents a footprint in our path but doesn’t represent a stain in our fate. Like I always say, the decision is only yours if you choose to reject them and allow them to live for you or recognize them as a part of you.

Like I’ve said, we are on an earthly experience and we need to control everything and that’s why we live hooked to the situations, people, experiences, nevertheless, you have to comprehend there are situations outside our possibility of change and we must accept them with love and compassion and in that way let them go, not for others but for ourselves and prevent our mental, emotional and physical health be limited because the only thing we’ll generate is an unecessary long-term frustration, and believe me, it doesn’t even worth it.

If you identify this wound in you, please don’t deny it, give yourself the process to understand that accepting it doesn’t make you the villain of the story, quite the opposite, you’ll become someone human capable to recognize, accept and love, remember, everyone’s here to learn and evolutionate, the main purpose is to be willing to do it.

I ask you to relax and inside the thoughts you evoke everyday start telling you: “I’m a person who knows how to go with the flow and takes the circumstances wisely, today I comprehend that everything is solved into the highest good of everyone, I see with love and humility all the people life gives me, because they are the teachers who allow me to grow, learn and love everyday of my life, today I release control because I understand nothing is mine, I choose to live without any attachements and serene, I know that I’m walking next to my best friend who is myself, I believe that my steps are given with absolutely certainty, so, it’s safe for me to trust”

I believe in you,
Shary ChavLó ∞