Love is happy when it is able to give something,
Ego is happy when it is able to take away something.

Osho

Ego is our darkest part inside, it’s the ally that sometimes joins fear; ties up to the past blaming it and hooks to the uncertainty of an illusory future. Let me tell you that ego is not the bad guy of the story, thanks to him we can recognize ourselves as unique and unrepeatable beings on this planet.

Ego has one important task: thanks to him we decide to come to this earthly experience, he does everything to defend our vulnerability because he feels so alone in this universe that prefers to live in competition, comparison and has the need to separate us from everything.

I see ego as the spoiled child screaming for attention all the time because he wants to avoid a non-existent danger and has the need to keep us away from unnecessary pain; preparing to attack before he is attacked. The risk does not come from listening to him, but from paying attention to him.

We all have the bad habit of rejecting, avoiding and evading him, because what we really are is what we deny the most; we must integrate, understand and love him; in the end, is a part of you and thanks to it, you’re here.

The goal is that you realize the moment he’s attending your thoughts, going to the side of fear telling you: “You can’t do it”, “don’t even try”, “he or she is against you”, “You won’t be what you desire”, “Is your fault”, “You are better than anyone”; that’s when ego thinks is hugging you and protecting you for not feeling abandoned, because he likes to be ahead.

When I told you about the being, I said it’s the most beatiful part we have; the consciousness that connects us with everything and sees love as the perfect solution; ego is the opposite: it separates, judges, excludes, because it’s better to push away the others and look at hate as the solution for everything.

Maybe you’re asking yourself: Why does it exists then? The answer is easy; in this world there has to be a balance, just as the day and night, male and female, cold and hot, love and hate, light and darkness…being and ego, our yin yang is that duality of being spiritual and earthly individuals to reach the spiritual-human balance.

Like emotions, is no better to choose our ego over our being, both will bring different experiences to us. If we choose the being, we’ll have strenght, love and certainty; if we go by the ego’s hand there will be insecurity disguised as attack, fear disguised as indifference, barriers disguised as anger, and misery disguised as selfishness.

For me, it’s important that you understand ego is not the villain of your story, he’s just scared because his mission is taking care of you and for that, he choose’s judgment to distinguish what’s good from what’s wrong, while our being just sees the experience and learning as an excuse for growth.

Ego is the shadow that’s part of you, and it doesn’t need to be denied because it will follow you everyday, just give yourself the chance to accept it understanding that as the dual person you are, your goal is to integrate it within you, not to hurt yourself, just so you can see your existence as something essential and understand that thanks to you, new changes can be achieved.

With gratitude,
Shary ChavLó.