When we finally achieve the goal of having found love, we start by thinking in marriage as the next step to take, so we can make that love last forever.

The word marriage comes from the latin words “maritare” (mother) and “munium” (care) it’s meaning is to provide with a wife, who can be the one in charge of the children while the husband protects them, remember when I talked you about women vs. men? I told you that what made us different was the rol we play on this earth, women take care of the interior of a territory while men defend it, so both of them can stablish a balance between give and receive, that’s called marriage.

Personally I don’t believe on tying the knot, because for me, the marriage we all know is an institution which refers to a social commitment about rules that have to be fulfilled, I’m certain that a real marriage is about the union of two people that contribute to each other, related and connected by a present love without unpredictable oaths to be the ones who endorse the union.

Loving someone is one thing, someone who loves you is another thing
but being loved by the same person you love, is everything.

Paulo Coelho.

I spoke you recently about time, I told you that time is a human’s invention that take us away from the only existing moment that’s now, because in the present is when everything happens, the same happens with love; we’re teached to give it an expiration time, which means: “until death do us part”, “to love you and respect you everyday of my life”, “to be faithful in sickness and in health”, so what happens if one of the two transcends or dies, love finishes?

I really find amazing that you are determined to go to the next level with your couple and see marriage as the next step to take, but like I’ve always said, go beyond all those social concepts that sometimes are focused on other consciousness and ask yourself: what’s marriage for me? Remember that in all those ideas and concepts are our secret beliefs, also have in mind we live in a society that only makes us believe but doesn’t makes us think, much less feel, but instead makes us believe that marriage is the key to ensure love and nothing in the world can break it.

If you ever notice, I always involve love as the best solution in all our processes, but I don’t talk about the ilusory love we have believed during the past years, I talked you about the love that is, an emotion that express because we feel it and in the same way we share with others because love is like breathing, it’s impossible to exist without it.

All those situations we’ve lived have taken us to define love as a dysfuctional act and we’ve made it deficient because: “we believe love hurts”, “it’s something you find outside” “something that manipulates”, “smth capable to change the other”, “possession”, “guilt”, “something that justifies” and all that love disguised of all those concepts is what you pretend to live everyday of your life and in that way you give your “I do” to something you swear eternal, just please remember that love refers to freedom, acceptance, understanding and respect; respect that the other is the way he/she is without the need of changing him/her because you understand that person has his/her own processes and learnings and you, have decided to accompany him/her in that way.

Have in mind that marriage doesn’t refer to children or a new family, real marriage refers to two parts that are in the same resonance, who share the same interests, two people who daily seek to become a better version of themselves, people who share their love and worth for the present, people that value each other because they each feel self-worthy, people that connect from a side of freedom and equality because they don’t possess each other, two persons that have decided to accompany without a space-time because they know that everything that unites them is the love they have decided to feel for each other.

Please if you are married or you pretend to be in the future, don’t do it with the idea of putting time on it, those ideas are based on the fear of imagine ourselves alone or abandoned, please make yourself the promise to love that person today, without any agreements you don’t know you’re going to meet, and that has nothing to do with love but everything to do with you being honest with yourself because life turns into unexpected ways and sometimes when we believe we have all the answers that accomodates our life, comes something beyond us that makes our questions to become others, and it’ll be here, when you would like to be in the same resonance with that partner who doesn’t care about any line in time, only a person that can be in the present moment building everything that until today, you keep promising to each other.

With gratitude and service,
Shary ChavLó ∞